Conflicting Emotions.

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She tried to ruin my life, she was full of hatred, bitter and twisted by life and the way she chose to see it. , always blaming other people.

I offered up friendship in the beginning, eventually withdrawing because no one stays around to be beaten with the emotion stick for too long.

My life continued without her in it, sure there would be the odd mention here and there and times when she would rear her head just to see if she could hurt again, on the whole though I managed to erase her from my life. I believe that it’s no good fighting fire with fire, sometimes it’s just easier to walk away.

Then I hear on the grapevine that she’s ill, that throws me into a spin. Half of me cares the other half doesn’t even want to acknowledge it. I sit alone wondering what I should do, how I should feel. Am I bad to not want to show any emotion? Who would thank me for interfering? What would it achieve to drag things up now and turn up out of the blue offering my friendship again…? No it’s best I stay away and let others fuss around her, she knows in her heart what she did was wrong, or does she?

I sit for over an hour nursing a cold cup of coffee before I become aware of the waitress hovering, the cafe wants to close and I’m keeping all of these people from their homes. Now I feel bad about that too and I’m no closer to knowing what I should do.

You can also join me on my  Niume blog.

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